King Rat (gkr) wrote,
King Rat
gkr

Asking for advice you don't want to hear

I am going to comment on a behavior I have just seen in the SeaGoth boreds. Yes, this is a little passive-aggressive. I am not going to publicly or privately tell the person how I think they should have handled this, because I don't think she'll take it too well. I suspect she'll take it poorly and be resentful. And since the specific instance of this matters little to me, and since I mostly want to comment on the general behavior than I do on her specific reaction, I am going to post anyway. Deal with it.

So here's the post that prompted this entry, for reference and example. This is not a flame on her, so please take this as such.

The behavior in question is asking for advice and then vehemently rejecting the advice given. Why? I can understand somewhat not following advice if it isn't asked for. I can understand not following advice even if asked for. I don't understand getting huffy about the advice though, as if you don't want to hear the suggestion at all. If you didn't want to hear the advice, you shouldn't have asked. So why do people ask for advice they don't want to hear?

Some people I won't even bothering to give advice when they ask me, simply because they make a habit of this behavior. There is a high likelyhood that they behave this way, and yet they still ask me. Some of them even continue to ask after I have told them I won't ever give them advice again because of it. (Most of the time these suggestions are about computer stuff, rather than relationship stuff like in the sample. I am not a good person to go to for relationship advice anyway.)

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