April 30th, 2012


Rule of Three

I have a rule of thumb. I’ll try three times to make plans with someone else without a definite response. After that, it’s up to them whether or not to do something. For instance, when asking someone out if I get three non-committal maybes, I won’t bother to ask the person out again. If they were secretly hoping for a relationship but were following some set of advice that says to play hard to get, it didn’t work. Or if they are just too busy to carve out an hour to hang out, I’ll know their time management would annoy the hell outta me if we were to date. This rule of thumb applies to making friends, business relationships, etc.

Any kind of definite response triggers the end of the rule. A no is obviously a no and I’m not going to pursue it. If the answer is yes, obviously the rule no longer applies. If the answer is something along the lines of I can’t do X, but how about Y that also counts as a definite answer.

It’s important to remember this is a rule of thumb, not something I apply rigidly. It depends on the person and the level of relationship I already have with them. But as a rule of thumb it keeps me from wasting my time.

Sometimes people just have to say maybe or cannot commit to a plan. But after three times it tells me they have a fundamental problem (perhaps justified) with being up front. It’s pretty demoralizing to keep chasing something while being strung along. I refuse to be strung along.

crossposted from King Rat.


Raspberry Lime Pie with Tequila-Raspberry Sauce

This is another of the pies I made for Pie Night and it was quite the hit. This one had no alcohol in the pie itself, and just a couple tablespoons in the sauce for it. The recipe was adapted from a recipe I found at the Driscoll’s berries web page.


  • 6 ounces worth of gluten free shortbread cookies
  • 4 ounces worth of gluten free graham crackers
  • 2 tablespoons crystallized ginger
  • 3 tablespoons butter
  • 1 package (¼ ounce packet) unflavored gelatin
  • 1 cup canned unsweetened cream of coconut (not coconut milk)
  • sugar
  • 1/3 cup plain yogurt
  • 4 or 5 limes
  • 4 six ounce packages raspberries
  • 1 cup heavy cream
  • 2/3 cup confectioners’ sugar
  • 2 tablespoons honey
  • 2 tablespoons tequila

The gluten-free shortbread cookies had a lot of moisture in them, and didn’t work out quite like the original recipe called for. My first attempt at the crust from this turned into a cake. In my second attempt, I substituted gluten free graham crackers for some of the shortbread cookies, and that worked out much better.

The original recipe also called for sweetened cream of coconut. I was unable to find this product. Instead, I used unsweetened cream of coconut. Then I looked up online how much sugar was in the sweetened version of the product, subtracted how much was in the unsweetened version, and added the difference. However, I didn’t write down the amount. I think it was 3 tablespoons but I could be way off.


  1. Preheat oven to 350°
  2. Chop the ginger
  3. Process shortbread cookies, graham crackers and ginger in a food processor
  4. Melt the butter
  5. Add butter to the cookie mixture
  6. Process until thoroughly mixed
  7. Press into a pie plate
  8. Bake for 10 minutes
  9. Allow to cool


  1. Mix gelatin and ¼ cup water in a glass mixing bowl
  2. Simmer a pot of water on the stove
  3. Once gelatin has bloomed, place the mixing bowl over the pot of water until the gelatin has dissolved
  4. grate about 1 teaspoon worth of lime zest
  5. squeeze enough limes to get ¼ cup of lime juice
  6. Combine cream of coconut, sugar, yogurt, lime zest and lime juice in a large bowl
  7. Stir until smooth
  8. Mix dissolved gelatin thoroughly in
  9. Mix in one package of raspberries
  10. Pour into the pie crust
  11. Refrigerate 4 hours or until set

Sauce and whipped cream

  1. Process remaining raspberries in food processor until they are so much pulp
  2. Strain raspberry pulp into a bowl (i.e., remove all the seeds)
  3. Combine heavy cream and confectioners’ sugar in a mixing bowl
  4. Whip the cream until stiff peaks form
  5. Mix half the raspberry puree into the whipped cream
  6. Spread whipped cream over top of the pie
  7. Combine remaining raspberry stuff with honey and tequila

Serve pie with raspberry-tequila drizzle.

crossposted from King Rat.